What should i do about my relationship?

What a mess! It sounds like he is genuinely depressed and he may need treatment for this. Ex-army personnel tend to have issues, especially if he saw active service. Being a man, it might be a bit of a struggle getting him to admit it, but if he does, that will help. If he doesn't want to go to college, he will have to get a job - no-one eats for free - and he might prefer this. I'd be a bit cautious about being a single parent - it won't help your career prospects, and it's not ideal for the kids either. Work out a budget for your family together, so he can see what problems there are, and why he needs to get some money somehow. Best of luck.